Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize