I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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