what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
