absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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