Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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