last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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