Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
