don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
