? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize