Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize