is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
