Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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