I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
