He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
