ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
