I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
