Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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