Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Randomize
