I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My day in three words: secret purse cake
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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