We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
