I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
