He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize