No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I need a beard to bite.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
