My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
