Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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