This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
