Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
