Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I will pee on everything he values.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize