I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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