It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
