VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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