Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
