Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
