Apparently you make a good broom.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
