but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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