Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
