He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
