Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
