Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Randomize
