Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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