talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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