their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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