Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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