Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
