All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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