Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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