so explain again why im purple
no
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
