Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
