My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
