I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
