Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
