they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
